Another Mother Read online

  “I was never working before.”

  “I work all the time, and so do half of the others.”

  What was I supposed to say to that? I couldn’t say I actually took my job seriously without implying that she didn’t… even though I was pretty sure she didn’t. She’d sometimes be out until six on a morning when she had to work at seven.

  Since when had I worried about offending other people, though? That seemed like something Sarah would do. Was that woman rubbing off on me? Maybe instead of getting into her mind, she was getting into mine.

  “You’ll see me more in December,” I finally said, and we left it at that.

  Thirteen – Sarah

  Hey, how’s your weekend?

  I didn’t get the text until hours after Katie had sent it. I’d just finished putting Emma to bed when I happened to look at my phone.

  Rather than texting back, I gave her a call. “Who is this?” she asked when she picked up.

  “Sarah. Emma’s mom?”

  “Trust me, I know who you are, Sarah.” Her words gave me a little shiver. “What number are you calling me from?”

  “My landline?” I didn’t know why my factual statements kept turning into questions.

  “You have a landline.” She chuckled. “Figures.”

  “Why?” I held the cordless phone to my ear as I put things in the fridge, cleaning up the leftovers from dinner.

  “You’re old-school.”

  “No, just old.”

  She laughed again, huskily. “I thought there was some kind of emergency when I heard my phone actually ring. I almost forgot this thing had voice capabilities.”

  “Well, you texted me.”

  “To say hi. I didn’t know you were going to invade my privacy like this.”

  I pressed plastic wrap over a bowl of corn and peas. “This isn’t a good time? Are you busy?”

  “Sarah, chill. It’s fine.”

  I smoothed the plastic down until it was satisfyingly flattened. “Okay. I was just calling to say my weekend’s been good, and how about yours?”

  “Good.” She sounded distracted, and there was a noise I didn’t recognize.

  “What are you doing right now?”

  “I was just memorizing my lines.”

  Oh, that was the sound—pages turning. “I should let you go.”

  “No, I want to talk to you.” She was silent for a moment, and I could tell she wasn’t looking at her lines anymore. “It’s been a lonely weekend, honestly.”

  My heart jumped. Katie wasn’t the kind of person to share something like that with just anybody. We really were friends now—she was letting me in. “Did you not see anyone?” I asked.

  “That’s the thing. I did… but… I still just felt lonely.” She stopped as if expecting a response. Instead I waited for her to continue, and after a second, she did. “It was one of my old party friends. I’m realizing I don’t even enjoy her company, and she’s like my best friend. How have I changed that much in only a couple months? Or did I always hate those people and just didn’t realize it?”

  “Hmm.”

  “I’m sorry to dump this on you,” she quickly said. “I guess I don’t have many people to talk to.”

  “You can talk to me.” I closed the fridge door and leaned against the counter.

  “I know.” She sighed. “If you’d just texted me like a normal person, we wouldn’t be having this conversation.”

  “You’re right, we literally wouldn’t be having it.”

  That got a laugh out of her. “You’re cool, Sarah. I like you.”

  My heart jumped a second time. “I like you, too.”

  “I’m glad we’re friends. You’re so easy to talk to. I wish I could connect with other people like I do with you.”

  “Katie, are you drinking right now?”

  She sounded guilty. “Is it that obvious?”

  “I thought you were sick of hangovers.”

  “I don’t get hung over from a few glasses of wine by myself. It’s the staying out late and taking shot after shot that gets me.”

  I wondered how much that was true. “Listen, I should probably go.”

  “Why? What do you have to do? Emma stuff?”

  “No, Emma’s in bed. I… well….” I just didn’t want her to embarrass herself if she was that tipsy. On the other hand, I was curious what else she might have to say. “I’m not doing much, actually. We can stay on the phone.”

  “Could I come over?”

  “Sorry?”

  She repeated herself, sounding younger and shyer by the moment. “Could I come over, Sarah? Just for a little bit. I want to see where you live, how you live… I’m tired of being alone.”

  “I – I guess you can come over,” I said slowly. “There’s nothing special about my place. It’s completely average.”

  “I want to see it.”

  I couldn’t imagine why she was so curious about how I lived. Why had she taken such an interest in my boring, average self in the first place? Biting back my questions, I gave her the address.

  “It’s not too far,” she said.

  “You’ll take a cab, right?”

  “No, I’ll take the bus.”

  “Oh.” I couldn’t picture her doing that. Wait, was she joking?

  She let out a snort—too loud to be cute, which somehow made it even cuter. “No, yeah, I’m going to take a damn cab.”

  “Okay. See you in a bit.”

  “See you, Sarah.”

  We hung up, and I attempted to wrap my mind around the fact that Katie Days was coming here. A tipsy, lonely, overly-affectionate Katie, at that.

  Was it too late to cancel? What was I going to do?

  *

  Twenty minutes later, my condo buzzer rang. I pressed the button to let Katie in, my heart already racing. I’d spent fifteen of the last twenty minutes frantically running around cleaning, and then the last five trying to make myself look presentable. I was pretty sure I’d failed.

  A knock came at my door, and I let Katie in. She looked the same as usual—a little bright-eyed, if anything, and she was holding an unopened bottle of wine.

  “Oh, you’re planning to drink more?” I asked.

  She gave me a tight hug, her breasts pressing up to mine. “Only if you feel like it.”

  I felt like too many things already, and wine would only make me feel like more. “I’ll get you a glass.”

  I tried to catch my breath during our moment apart. When I came back, she was looking around my place as if she’d never seen a normal middle-class home before. “This is nice,” she said. “I like it.”

  “You can take your shoes off.” I wondered how much those shiny white sneakers cost.

  She came inside, peering around the doorframe to get a look in the kitchen before settling herself in the den. “What would you be doing if I wasn’t here?”

  “Work, probably.” Or definitely.

  “Oh, shoot, I’m interrupting your work time.” She’d just swung her feet up on the couch, and now she swung them back down. “Of course you’d be working now that you put Emma to bed. It was so stupid of me to come. I’ll just go.”

  “No, it’s fine.” I considered squeezing onto the couch next to her, but sat on the armchair instead. “I’m somewhat caught up, for once. I was just hoping to get ahead before the week starts.”

  “Okay, if you’re sure.” She unscrewed the wine bottle’s cap and poured herself a glass. “Are you sure you don’t want any, then? Celebrate being all caught up?”

  “Well… maybe a little.” I got up to grab myself another glass.

  When I came back, Katie patted the spot on the couch next to her. “Sit, sit. Don’t be a stranger.”

  “I like how you’re inviting me to sit in my own condo,” I said dryly. “You’ve really made yourself at home.”

  “Glad you like it,” she said without a hint of irony.

  We sat quietly for a second as I struggled to think of something to say
. Nothing quite felt right at the moment—everything that came to mind was either too normal, failing to address the weirdness of the situation, or too weird, which would make this even more awkward. I should’ve spent less time cleaning, which Katie clearly didn’t care about, and more planning what would happen once she got here.

  Luckily, Katie didn’t seem to feel the awkwardness. She splashed wine into my glass, far more than I would’ve asked her for, narrowly avoiding spilling it onto my grey sofa before recapping the bottle. “Feels like we should have some girl talk!” she said brightly.

  “Does it?”

  “Isn’t that what straight girls do when they get together?”

  I swallowed. “You’re not straight, Katie.” And I might not be, neither.

  She seemed unfazed. “It’d be fun to imagine I was, just for a little while. It’s impossible to be good friends with a woman when sex always gets in the way.”

  I could imagine—at least from the other woman’s perspective, because sex was definitely getting in the way at the moment. Katie just oozed it: at work, at restaurants, and even more so now, alone in my condo with a light haze of alcohol blurring her features. I could feel her body heat, could smell her hair. If she asked me to take off all my clothes right now, I’d do it without asking questions.

  “So tell me about your love life,” she said, turning to stare directly into my eyes. “I assume you don’t have a boyfriend, but you must have sex, right? Do you have a friend with benefits?”

  I bit my lip, knowing the question inside me was going to come out, and trying to find a better way to ask than simply blurting it. “How did you know you were gay?” Oops, there it was.

  She blinked, her long lashes fluttering over her pretty eyes. “I… think I always knew, in a sense,” she said, her tone going serious. “I grew up on a TV set, so I missed a lot of the usual stuff that went along with adolescence. No one was harassing me about getting a boyfriend, and it slowly clicked that my feelings toward certain girls in my life were more than platonic.”

  “There was no a-ha moment?”

  “Well… there was the time I stumbled onto a softcore lesbian porn while I was flipping channels,” she said. “I must’ve been about fourteen, and I was mesmerized.”

  I nodded. I hadn’t had any a-ha moments—until the day I started having feelings for her. “Did you ever try guys?”

  “I didn’t need to,” she said. “As soon as I started dating women, it just felt right.” She took a gulp of wine, then looked closer at me. “Why’s this stuff on your mind?”

  “No reason,” I quickly said.

  “Are you sure?”

  I swigged back the rest of my own drink, the alcohol making me wince as it hit me with full force. “I’ve never thought I was completely straight,” I admitted. “I just don’t know how not-straight I might be.”

  Her eyes drilled into mine, and I had the impression that she’d become completely sober. “Is there someone making you question things?” she asked softly. “Someone in your life, maybe?”

  Oh, God. Oh, fuck. I’d known I shouldn’t bring up this topic. She’d figured me out now—she knew I wanted her. Now she’d have to let me down, gently explain that I wasn’t her type at all and that we should just stay friends, after which she’d distance herself from me more and more until she was again the complete stranger she’d been only a few months ago.

  Or, even more terrifying, she’d be pleased by my confession. She’d lean forward and press her lips to mine… then take my hand and lead me into the bedroom.

  I shuddered.

  “It’s Autumn, isn’t it?” she asked, a smile dancing at the corners of her lips. “I’ve seen the way you look at her on set. She is pretty—I can talk to her if you want. I don’t know if she swings that way, but—”

  “No, Katie, it’s you!” I burst out, and immediately covered my mouth. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that.”

  “I already knew, you idiot.” Her eyes glittered, and she leaned toward me.

  I should’ve moved, but I couldn’t, and all of a sudden her lips were on mine, soft and warm, with her feminine scent drifting to my nose and making my head spin. I let the kiss go on a second too long before I came to my senses and pulled away.

  “Okay? Not okay?” Her concern was evident now.

  I thought through the answer in a flash. It might end up being a terrible idea, but those few seconds of kissing her had been exquisite. I could still feel the pressure of her lips, and I wanted to feel it again. “Very okay.”

  Another kiss, longer this time, and my mind settled enough for me to be conscious of what I was doing. What did I want from Katie? More importantly, what did she want from me?

  She broke away, still caressing my face and hair as she looked me in the eye. My skin tingled where she touched it, and I became aware of a longing in my core. Yes, I was definitely attracted to women—at least one woman.

  I opened my mouth, then closed it. I felt like I should say something, but what was there to say? I could tell her this was my first lesbian kiss and that it was everything I’d been dreaming about… but with the amount of chemistry I was feeling, I knew she could feel it too.

  Taking her by the shoulders, I pulled her close again. I traced my hand down her face, wanting to touch and savor every part of her at once, and also to grab and hold her, to claim her as mine. I compromised and allowed my hand to drift down to her breast, and my breath caught in my throat when I heard her give a soft gasp.

  She laced her fingers through mine, and when her eyes met mine again, they were hot with desire. “Want to take this to the bedroom?” she murmured.

  My heart pounded. I did, but—but—what was the problem again? I couldn’t remember anymore. “Mm-hmm.” I nodded.

  “Mm-hmm?” She licked her lips, and it occurred to me that with all her dating experience, not to mention her fame, she was somehow just as nervous as I was.

  “Mm-hmm,” I confirmed.

  I sat there expectantly, waiting for her to take some initiative. After a moment, she tugged on my hair playfully. “Sarah, I don’t know where your bedroom is.”

  “Oh. Right.” Still holding her hand, I got up. Now I was the one leading her to the next step, and the feeling of being in charge left me breathless.

  Once we got into my room, she took control again, kissing and caressing me while she pulled my shirt over my head. I did the same to her, my center throbbing more with each inch of skin that was exposed. “God, Katie, you’re beautiful.”

  “And you’re amazing.” She ran her hands over me, and the tingling only got stronger. I wanted those hands—and lips, and tongue—on every part of me.

  We tumbled onto the bed, and the rest of our clothes came off in a quiet frenzy. I couldn’t tell who was doing what to whom anymore, only that everything felt so right, so good. Our lips melded together, and then we were kissing and touching and licking other parts of each other’s bodies.

  Everything was soft and warm, smooth curves rather than hard lines. Katie was gentle and patient as she showed me what to do, and then she was lying back and moaning as I tried my best to do it.

  The world blurred around me, everything gone except our pleasure. Katie took long, gasping breaths under me, and then she was over me, nudging my legs apart as she dropped between them. What was she doing to me? How could I be this wet, this needy, this desperate?

  I shuddered once, twice, and my body seized up as my climax took over me.

  Katie and I had just had sex… so what was going to happen at work tomorrow?

  Fourteen – Katie

  I left early in the morning, taking a cab to my place before Emma woke up. Sarah said a sleepy goodbye, clinging to me in a way that screamed she didn’t want me to leave. I had to change clothes and shower, though… grab my script and try to sort out my thoughts.

  The last one was the main issue, of course. I had no idea what’d happened last night—well, other than the best sex of my entire life
. How had we gone from Sarah confessing her curiosity about women to the two of us pleasuring each other for hours? And more importantly, how did I feel about that?

  I closed my eyes as the cab jolted over a pothole, trying to parse through my emotions. I liked Sarah. I liked her more than anyone else I’d hooked up with, which wasn’t a problem when we weren’t hooking up—but now that we had, my usual habit of slowly fading wasn’t going to work too well.

  I wanted to have lunch with her again, or maybe take her out after work. And more than anything, I wanted to get in her bed again. She’d been so awed by every little thing I did to her, and I had a lot more ideas for how to blow her mind.

  By the time I arrived at the studio, I was still daydreaming about Sarah’s gorgeous body. Last night had been so sweet and sensual, and I wanted a repeat as soon as humanly possible. Who cared if that wasn’t my normal way of doing things? Clearly that way wasn’t working for me anymore, so I was going to roll with this for a little while and see how it went.

  In the make-up room, the stylists were already halfway through getting Emma ready. “About time you showed up,” Kiara said, giving me a dirty look.

  “Sorry.” I slid into a chair. “Had a late night.”

  Sarah’s eyes met mine, and she smiled without turning up her lips. “Anyone special?” she asked softly.

  “I don’t kiss and tell.” I waited to make sure no one else was looking, then winked at her.

  *

  Sarah was free for lunch that day, which was perfect because by noon I was just about dying to see her again. I’d been spaced out all morning while we ran through our lines, which was a bad look considering I hadn’t memorized them last night. I should’ve been working on them through the lunch hour, and yet here I was, waiting for Sarah at the exit of the building.

  “Hey,” I said when she approached, giving her an awkward hug. I’d meant to say “hey, beautiful,” and to hug her a lot more gracefully, but all of this was a little new for me. I was only accustomed to being smooth up to the point of each conquest. Trying to keep someone’s interest after was a whole new ball game.